on 14-06-2012 02:19 AM
If the first time you have chastised a child is when it is six, then you may do more harm than good, as by the age of six a child has probably developed quite a distinct personality and in all likelihood it will be very difficult to teach a child of that age boundries who hadn't been taught any before.
It is all a matter of degree, how much time is available in a given situation and what kind of personality you're dealing with in the first place. For example, if you turned round and somehow a baby had got out of secure location like every baby on the planet has managed to do at sometime in their young lives and was crawling towards the cupboard
on 14-06-2012 02:43 AM
under the sink where the cleaning materials are kept, a sharp harshly said 'NO' should probably be the first course of action.
However, if you have a strong willed - possibly boistrous & wilful child (which normally denotes intelligence) then the verbal command may need something more severe to confirm you MEAN the verbal command.
You cannot expect a baby/toddler to grasp the complicated concept of respect, in some situations there just isn't the time to try & reason with them. They'll only understand & more importantly REMEMBER pleasure & pain at that age. It is a complete folly imo to give them the understanding that mummy & daddy are only associated with pleasure. They need to understand that mummy & daddy may dispense both pleasure & pain in order for you to teach them boundries.
Just learning pleasure will not be a good foundation to work from and certainly will not instill respect later on when they do understand the concept. Infact, what is learnt and I've seen it - is contempt!
14-06-2012 02:51 AM - edited 14-06-2012 03:07 AM
Complete imbecile to believe that.
You see. both those last posts were insulting and I'm not insulting you!
As for going to America to bring up children - no thanks - I saw the problems Jamie Oliver had with their schools and the children over there. At least our kids got the concept he was trying to get over to them, far more quickly than their kids - which was no surprise to me either!
on 14-06-2012 07:44 AM
14-06-2012 09:56 AM - edited 14-06-2012 10:09 AM
I wonder if this thread will be deleted or locked when I get back home later? I was smacked once when I was 3 for running into the road, I wasn't again because sending me to my room/shouting at me/taking stuff away was enough. I think/hope everyone on here understands there is a difference between a smack on the bum/hand and a full on beating, though sadly not everyone that has kids.
I totally agree with what you have just said & I hope my thread is not deleted or lock & I'll do my level best to keep it on topic & not be drawn into meaningless insults.
I feel it should be mandatory that when a family has a new baby that they have to attend parenting classes to help them bring up this new child.
Reading some of the few posts to my thread already, I can see that there's almost something akin to hysteria over this whole subject.
As a society we have to be far more level headed about this issue. There needs to be clear rules from the goverment of what is permissable & what is not.
on 14-06-2012 10:12 AM
Logicintuwisdom wrote:As a society we have to be more level headed over this whole issue The needs to be clear rules from the goverment of what is permissable & what is not.
I'd say that we need far less advice and guidance from the government on how parents should raise and discipline their children, combined with far more stringent sanctions for those who are clearly not well suited to being parents (such as those who cannot distinguish between measured smacking and mindless beating for example).
In any case doesn't all of that 'smacking is violence' thinking originate from the bureaucracy of Brussels who have nothing better to do than define new rules?
on 14-06-2012 10:18 AM
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