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21 May 2012
By Logicintuwisdom

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Number 1 versus number 2 - which would you say is more enjoyable?

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I find number 1's really irritating - you always have to do one just before you sit down to have a meal - why is that? It's so annoying don't you think?

 

On the other hand - a number 2 can be cultivated and matured like a good wine or cheese. It's not nearly so urgent and one can really enjoy the final chapter all the better for the maturing process wouldn't you agree?

 

 

:Lol:

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All in all you're just another brick in the wall.

 

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Hmmmmmmm Pink Floyd and there was my thinking you were just a smug smart derrière!

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Logicintuwisdom wrote:

 you always have to do one just before you sit down to have a meal - why is that?



Nope, just you.

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I normally pee just before I leave a building, I did it so much I didnt even think about it, everytime I was gonna leave a shopping centre, house, Id pee.

 

It worked out great for me until an ex of mine started to complain, that every time we had to leave somewhere I was like "Hold on" then id go off to pee and make her wait.

 

I thought it was a pretty silly thing to complain about, but I took it on board and adjusted my behaviour.

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fenian wrote:

I normally pee just before I leave a building, I did it so much I didnt even think about it, everytime I was gonna leave a shopping centre, house, Id pee.

 

It worked out great for me until an ex of mine started to complain, that every time we had to leave somewhere I was like "Hold on" then id go off to pee and make her wait.

 

I thought it was a pretty silly thing to complain about, but I took it on board and adjusted my behaviour.


At least it meant you would never have to stop off to pee somewhere while on your journey .

 

Women

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dont worry danny, i got my own back on her, got her pregnant and waited until she was too far along to abort, then left the country.

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Moghal2007

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Number 1+2 simultaneously? :P
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Logicintuwisdom wrote:

 you always have to do one just before you sit down to have a meal - why is that?


 

The worst timing is right before an exam. I always feel the need even though I went just 10 minutes ago!

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It's worse when you've just got in the car.

 

I usually just aim it out the window while going down the A13.

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shanethegooner wrote:

It's worse when you've just got in the car.

 

I usually just aim it out the window while going down the A13.


 

So that was You!!

 

 

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Am I the only one who poops before they start their day?

I've never been caught out when I've been out and about.
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dannyjt wrote:
Am I the only one who poops before they start their day?

I've never been caught out when I've been out and about.

 

It doesnt matter to me what time, day or night it's not a problem. Not with my handy colostomy bag & urinary cathater ensemble

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I had a really big hard poo this morning but then afterwards it felt really nice.
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Spotter5 wrote:
I had a really big hard poo this morning but then afterwards it felt really nice.


You had a poo and then felt it afterwards? 

 

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I went to Great Yamouth once, got heatstroke, went to mcdonalds, eat a burger, got a tummy bug, really needed a poo, went to the toilet, no lock, hold door with one hand, squirt it out, runny overflow, went everywhere, leaked into the restaurant, no toilet roll, ran out with trousers down, ran into the sea, never sun bathed again, never done a poo in a public toilet ever again

 

From that experience I prefer to wee, plus I like getting my johnson out.

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I've worked out doors most of my working life so quite often taking an emergency dump has proved difficult.

I was once working in a council estate and suddenly I felt last nights chilli wanting out, well there wasn't many options at hand as it was about to splurt out any second so I just took cover in some bushes in the local church gardens (it was winter so they had no leaves on them) and pulled down my jeans and just let it all rip, I'm sure if anyone was looking from their windows they would have seen it all.

Another time I seriously stunk out the kitchens of this posh hotel that had a wedding party going on, again I was working and had to go due to chilli bum and the staff in the hotel told me to use their toilets which were attached to the kitchens, I bet they wish never let me use them by the time I was done in there.

I pooped myself once walking home when I was drunk too.

I have many more poo related tales to share but I think I've said enough.

This thread is crap by the way, fish finger ones are better.
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